Free Marriage Counselling : Key To Healthy Relations
We all lure to get some Free Marriage Counselling when it comes resolving conflicts. Isn’t it?
Today if we look around, we see nobody is very satisfied in their personal lives. Everyone has got ups and downs in their lives, well, this is the rite of nature from which nobody is forbidden. Nowadays, there are a lot of and doctors out there who listen to your problems and give you their suggestions. But the irony is, like nothing is free in this world, neither are their suggestions. This sounds very tragic when you are already messed up with your personal life, where money can also be a responsible factor; you cannot afford to give an additional $100 dollars to the counselor.
It is mostly observed that men are mostly not interested in putting out their personal agendas in front of strangers, they rather solve it in their own ways. But still, if there is something very serious which need external help, one should most forwardly go and see a therapist.
There can be a few diy’s to help your relationships to grow strong and firm, a few can be;
Evict The Four Horsemen Of Divorce
If a couple can identify and rectify these four horsemen who lead to divorce, the marriage can often be saved. Let’s see which are these four horsemen.
Now there are a lot of people who mix criticism and complaints, but there is a hair thick difference between these two. Complaints are always about the partner’s habits and behaviors which is not liked by the other partner. But criticism goes further and attack the person himself. Complaints are okay when the partners are ready to take them positively and respect each other’s thoughts but criticism is something every couple has to deal with.
Like every coin has two faces of its. Likewise in relationships, intimacy plays a very vital role it can bring healing and acceptance but it can also reveal where it hurts the most to your partner. When intimacy is taken negatively and taken advantage of, things get worse. Contempt is beyond criticism, it is a purposeful attempt to demean, disrespect and hurt your partner. Contempt starts with biting sarcasm, insults, hostile humor, name-calling etc; and it can be seen in eye-rolling, lip-curling or gestures of the partner.
There are times when there is a little part of the truth in the criticism, but always what matter is the way how the dish is served to you. If the criticism is served in a contemptuous way, it is natural that the other person will get defensive. This will emerge a situation where there will be more excuses, denial to responsibilities, counter-accusations and angry disapproval. In such situations, if one of the partners can play a bigger role and be more patient in listening rather than quarreling, a relationship can be saved.
Even when you have severed conflicts and breakdown when all the contempt and criticism is done. It is mostly seen that there is a awkward silence which comes in the frame where one of the partners is no more interested in talking about the problem and choose to ignore but this accelerates even a higher level of frustration in other partners. So, it is always better to talk, talk till you solve or even when you do not have a solution, at least reach to a mutual discussion. Stonewall is the worst phase in a relationship which can occur when this is encountered it is very important to give attention and talk about things.
Be Best Friends
It is very well said, that it is okay to have less love in a couple but friendship should never be less. Always try to be a best friend of your better half, a friend to whom you can talk about every possible thing which exists in this parallel world. Go out together to eat, to roam around, to explore. Be someone who can be relied upon. Hide nothing because friends do not.
Do Not Try Fly Solo
When you are in a relationship, it is never just about you. Then it should always be us. Being self-centric can never flourish in a relationship because when you are in a relationship, every step you take is affecting you, your partner and also your children. So, never try to fly solo else you will end up being solo.
“Sharing spreads love”. Other than your toothbrush, you can share everything, lol. Sharing things like clothes, books, songs etc develops common interests and develop healthy topics to talk about.
Life is all about Adjustments. Learn to adjust. Rest all will fall in place.